A Comedian I'm Not (Always)

Yesterday's post was NOT funny.


I tried to make it funny, but it just wasn't funny. It felt forced.


I've had "My Funny" leave me only once before while writing Abby Gabs, and I managed to turn it into a relatively funny post. (Not like yesterday's post.) So, I started wracking my brain to figure out why my post yesterday was less than funny.


That's when it hit me.

AHA!

PMS. PMS affects My Funny. (Generic apology to my male readers here.)


PMS doesn't necessarily take away My Funny. It just dulls it a bit. IE: The wit is still there, it just seems fuzzy around the edges. See, when it's just a normal, PMS-free day, I'm all wit and charm and hilarity.

These are the days I come up with my best blog ideas.

But on PMS-y days, my thoughts are otherwise occupied. While I can come up with somewhat decent topics to write about, they always feel a little less...shiny. That's probably because my thoughts are consumed with other things...

Like huge Hostess cupcakes. And how I'm going to murder the next person who calls and interrupts The Gilmore Girls. And tequila. Always tequila.

There must be a hormone to blame. Or lack of sleep. Not enough caffeine? Something about PMS is seriously toying with my ability to be funny. Which indirectly affects my ability to be adorable. I mean, who's going to keep coming back to read a "sort of okay" blog??? 


And if today is the first day you've ever read my blog, and you're thinking, "She thinks she's funny? Really?"---PLEASE don't judge me by this post, or yesterday's! Just go read this one, and you'll swear you've just encountered Whoopi Goldberg's long lost Caucasian cousin.


Because, brain gnomes? Seriously?

"I'm SOOOO not funny."

WAIT! I just thought of a way to make the cute little brain gnome funny!!!

Now THAT'S funny.

Introducing: Me

Let's talk blogs. I've written one before. In fact, I've had a few. But here's the problem with me: if my blog doesn't have a "theme" I feel...incomplete. Weird. I'm not sure why. I has something to do with knowing that, if I want to blog about Topic A, I can go to Blog A, and write about Topic A to an audience who expects said topic. But what if I want to blog about Topic L? Then where do I go? I can't possibly blog about Topic L on Blog A??? What am I, a crazy person?? (Ok, so I'm slightly OCD...but that DOES NOT constitute crazy.)

The truth: my attention span is about the size of a garden gnome. Seriously. If you know me personally, you know that my conversation techniques border on schizophrenic. We can be having a detailed discussion about pie filling one minute, and before you know it, we're way over here conversing the finer points of car insurance.

That's just me. That's how I work.

So I wanted to create a blog where I could come on a daily basis and write about whatever the heck I want to write about. No themes. No gimmicks. No crazy flowery background with equally crazy flowery writing. I'm not pretending to be totally knowledgeable about anything. I'm not giving advice about weight loss, or pretending that my life story is one that the masses MUST READ. 

(Although, if you are reading this, you're a member of the masses, and I thank you for visiting my humble blog.)

The truth is, I'm complex. I like a hundred different things, I have a million different thoughts a day, I have six hobbies, none of which I maintain on a regular basis. I have a fairly humorous life, a pretty positive outlook, and four fat cats that make me smile.  


I like long sentences, excessive punctuation, italics, bold, and emoticons.


I love my husband, and my family, and my friends, and I love to write.


So---I created this blog to write about all those things. And my Etsy shop. Oh, and my hobbies, which include crocheting, cooking, reading, watching movies, listening to music, and other generic things that most people like to do.


And I might write a review or two.


So that's it. The whole shebang. Welcome to my blog--I hope to entertain you.