Twitter Confuses Me

Once upon a time, there was a girl who was loved to write. One day, she decided she was going to bite the proverbial bullet and jump into the blogosphere. Her daily jaunts into the internets were entertaining, and kept her busy for hours. She Photoshopped from morn to dusk, and it made her heart sing. Then, one day, the girl decided that, if she wanted the rest of the world to read her blog, she'd have to venture into the world of Twitter, and conquer the world one tweet at a time.


In case I had you guessing, that girl is me. And let me also say, this post may be controversial. Because if I believe CNN, Fox News, Hannah Montana, and the rest of the world, Twitter is apparently the niftiest thing since the internet was invented.


I don't get it.


See, when I first joined Twitter, I was all like, "OMG! I'm going to go follow every single person who's famous that I like, so I can see what they do all day! Hooray!"


And off I went, skipping and singing and turning cartwheels, and proceeded to follow 200 people who don't know me from Eve.


Are you familiar with that famous party question, "If you could invite anyone to dinner, alive or dead, who would it be?"


Well, somedays, logging onto Twitter feels like the answer to that question:

Yea, I follow Sesame Street. Don't you?

There are a handful of celebrities that I follow on a stalker-ish basis. I'm amazed at how well they utilize Twitter...the hashtags and the twit vids and the bubble tweets and the ability to always know what's trending. Everytime I post something and tag a celebrity in it, I always wonder, "Do they see this? Do they read it? Do they care?"


I also wonder, from time to time, if the celebrity in question is really the one doing the tweeting, or if some baked-out grad student is being paid in peanuts to do the tweeting. 


But still, when I log into Twitter and begin reading what all these people, famous and not, have to say, I feel my mind filling with white noise. There's SO many people. So many opinions. Not all of them are mine. Not all of them are interesting. Most of them aren't funny.


And yet, I stand on my Twitter platform, and tweet all about my blog, and my life, and my day-t0-day life events. I try to keep my tweets humorous and entertaining, and I never tweet things like, 'Gee, I'm so bored." or "I just washed my underwear!" I try to remain engaging, funny, witty, sarcastic...all the things I try to pump into my blog on a daily basis. 


I can say that I have a wider variety of followers on Twitter than I do on any other social media networking site. People I don't know have somehow managed to find me, and follow me, and even follow my blog. So that, as far as I'm concerned, is a major plus in the Positive Attributes Associated with Twitter column.


But I can't help but feel like my tweets are being lost in the wind. 

Perhaps I need to hire a baked-out grad student to make my Twitter account soar.