Jury Duty and Other Motivational Posters

Yesterday, I had jury duty.

(Yes, that's an Abby Gabs original. Feel free to use it.)


From approximately 8:30 am to 1:30 pm, my day went a little like this:


8:30 A.M.: Arrive early at the courthouse to ensure I'm at the right place. Park  car. Look around and notice all the other jurors there early, all busy playing with their smart phones. Pull Droid out of purse and immediately take on the group mentality. 


8:40 A.M.: Turn off Droid, lock in glove compartment, weep.


8:41 A.M.: Repair mascara in rearview mirror. Gather belongings (except sad little Droid) and head to the courthouse. It's a 1 block hike from the car. I'm wearing heels. 


8:45 A.M.: Enter front door. Immediately be accosted by angry looking security guard. Become just as angry when he asks if I have a cell phone. Grumble something about leaving it in the car. Walk through giant metal detector, snatch my purse from evil guard (who is only evil for taunting me about my phone) and join the other jurors milling about downstairs.


8:50 A.M.: Follow the leader up the stairs to the Jury Processing room. Sit in a chair by the wall. Smile at nice looking young woman who sits next to me. Compliment her yellow scarf.


8:51 A.M. - 9:09 A.M.: Read. Make some polite small talk. Re-read the same paragraph I just read. More small talk. Re-read the same paragraph for the 3rd time. Give up and put away Kindle.

9:10 A.M.: Jury Processing begins. Line up, wait. Get to front of line, give name, Juror number, number of miles traveled to court house. I say "10." She hands me my badge and I go back to my seat.


9:11 A.M. - 9:44 A.M.: Rest of Jurors check in. I manage to make a little more headway in my book.  People start getting restless. The tenor of the room changes.


9:45 A.M.: Woman in charge starts giving us instructions. People ask stupid questions. I decide I want a t-shirt that reads "There Are No Stupid Questions, Just Stupid People." We're told to take this opportunity to use the bathroom, since once we're in court, no one can leave. 


9:58 A.M.: Stampede. I stay seated for fear of being trampled by frantic women racing to empty their bladders.


10:05 A.M.: Head into main courtroom. Sit in extremely uncomfortable pew-like benches. Settle in for the long haul. 


10:10 A.M. - 11:00 A.M.: Try to stay awake while judge reads every indictment against the accused in the first case of the day.  Listen to every Juror--all 125 of us--as we stand, state our names, Juror numbers, and occupations for the record. One. At. A. Time. Laugh at electrician with a ponytail sitting next to me, who doesn't succeed in staying awake and snores approximately every 6 minutes.

11:01 A.M. - 11:38 A.M.: Wait as Juror numbers are randomly called to fill the jury box. Wait some more. Wait a little more. 


11:39 A.M.: Queue up to head to a smaller courtroom for the next case. With the sleepy electrician. 


11:45 A.M. - 12:15 P.M.: Listen to the new judge read the high points of the civil case. He's much faster. No time to read. We are excused for a 10 minute break, as the jury will be selected randomly from a computer this time. Again--stampede to the bathroom. This time I risk it. No Jurors are harmed in the great race to the toilets.


12:30 P.M.-12:58 P.M.: Thirteen Juror numbers (12 for the Jury, one alternate) are called to hear this case. Mine is not one of them. 


1:00 P.M.: With instructions to call the Juror hotline every day for the rest of the week, the lucky few beat feet to the parking lot. It's like the last day of school before summer break. There may be a woman waving her blazer out of the top of a Jeep as it squeals into the road. 

So, after 5 hours of waiting around, I was finally let off the hook for jury duty yesterday. That's the good news.


The bad news? I may have to go back tomorrow.

I'm linking up with Ryan at The Woven Moments, and sharing my favorite blog post (of my own) from the month of November! Come check out the linky party...just click below!

A Spider Encounter, A NaNoWriMo Update, A Novel Blurb, And Yet Another Poll

Wow, that's a really long title. But don't worry, readers. I will deliver on what I have promised.


Last night, after several hours of writing, I decided it was finally time to save, quit, and head to bed. I sauntered into my bathroom to brush my teeth. Halfway through applying the toothpaste to the toothbrush, I got the uncanny sense that someone was watching me. Glancing around, I noticed that the bathroom was still empty of all felines, so I knew that my audience wasn't furry, or friendly.


Yes, I'm going there.


My spider-sense was tingling.


And not the kind that tells me that there's an armed gunman holding up a bank teller on Main Street in Gotham.


But the kind that tells me there's a creepy crawly somewhere within 10 feet of me.


Determined not to be run out of my own bathroom, I continued to brush my teeth while scanning the corners for any lurkers. And that's when I see it...tucked into a corner on the ceiling.

Those are his "I'm Going To Kill You" eyes.

Now granted, this wasn't a very big spider. In fact, without my glasses on and while squinting, it was barely bigger than an ant.


However, there are two very distinct reasons why this spider freaked me out beyond reason. Number one: It was on the ceiling. Which means at any given moment, it could drop down on me unawares and land somewhere on my body. Like, in my hair. *shudder* And Number two: I was home alone. As in, sans husband. As in, there was no one at home to rescue me from the arrant arachnid taking up residence in my bathroom.


So I did the only logical thing there was to do. I closed the door and spat my toothpaste into the kitchen sink. I stuffed a towel under the door so the little bugger couldn't escape. And I left my husband a note to vanquish the evil beastie.


I will not be bested by an eight-legged  insect.

*****

In other news, my novel writing for NaNoWriMo is going smashingly well. I crossed the 10,000 word mark last night, and I'm just plowing right along. I'm feeling really confident about the quantity of the words I've written, and I've got to say, I'm feeling pretty good about the quality as well. 

Of course, I'm still in the stage of writing the part of the book I'd envisioned all along.

Who knows what will happen when I get beyond that point. Seriously, who knows? Anybody? Would you be interested in cluing me in?

However, I do have a slight problem. I'm having a bit of a novel identity crisis. 

There are several genres to choose from when it comes to classifying your novel on the NaNo website, and I'm flip flopping between Chick Lit and Mainstream Fiction. Or possibly Humor. 

I originally planned to go with Chick Lit, but when I checked into the forums, a lot of the authors there were describing books that sounded like a cross between romance and erotica. And while my tale may include a bit of flirtation, I don't forsee a major romance involved in the plot. At least not in the FIRST 50,000 words. (Maybe something sexy will happen later. We'll see.) 

That being said, the mainstream fiction forum is all over the place. There seems to be a bit of everything over there, and it feels a little like I'd get lost in the shuffle.

So, I'm going to ask for your help again, readers. Below, I'm going to entice you with a blurb from my novel, working title "Lena and the Boys," and let you decide how I should categorize it. 

*****

Synopsis: 

Lena went to all the right schools, followed all the right paths, and shook all the right hands. And yet, 8 years out of New York University, she still finds herself in a dead-end job, working out of a tiny cubicle, with nothing to look forward to each day. The only thing that gets her through is her infatuation with The Beantown Boys, the boy band from her childhood. She's been in love with Derrick Walsh, the band's "bad boy," since she was 10 years old. And when she finds him on Twitter, it's only a matter of time before 10 minutes of internet time a day turn into hours of stalking. In the past few weeks, the band has been hinting at some major announcement, and their biggest fans are all a flutter. Lena has no idea, when she enters her cubicle on a random Thursday afternoon, that her life is about to change in a major way--and all because of a contest on her favorite social networking site.

Brief Excerpt: 

The bright pink page of Perez Hilton’s internet tabloid popped onto Lena's computer screen. At the top read the headline “The Beantown Boys Summer Reunion: True or False?” Below it was a fuzzy picture of Derrick, Corey, Chris and Zac sitting around a table in one of the many Manhattan street-side cafes. Lena scanned the article.

Could it be?

Is it true?

Are The Beantown Boys finally going to make millions of middle-aged women’s dreams come true?

The scuttlebutt about the internet is yes. The BBoys of 1989 fame are looking to make a comeback. 

And they’re hoping the throngs of teenage girls that followed them around twenty-some years ago are going to be just willing to find babysitters, take vacation days, and leave their husbands at home to follow them around the world again.

According to a recent Tweet from Derrick Walsh: “BBoy Sisters are in for the biggest XMAS gift, ever! Stay tuned for deets, my sweets! Word!”

It could be the December we’ll always remember, girls. As Derrick says, stay tuned! The big announcement is coming today, at noon. Look for a video posted by none other than Derrick himself! Twitter, here we come!

Lena’s heart was pounding in her ears. She sat back heavily in her chair, glanced over shoulder at Greg, and grinned. “So Greg,” she asked. “What are your Christmas plans this year? Wanna take off for 2 weeks and buy up all the concert tickets we can afford?”

An evil grin crossed Greg’s face. “I’m sure Gram would understand if I told her I was going to miss her famous pumpkin pies for the chance to throw my $45 underwear on the stage at Chris Knox.”

They giggled conspiratorially. Mr. Cox cleared his throat somewhere from the depths of his office. Greg blanched. “I’d better get back to work. I’ve still got 3 more reports to finish. What do you say—lunch, noon, Davis Square?”

“Be there, or be square.” Lena said.

“Oh no you didn’t.”

“Oh yes. Yes I did.”

She turned to her computer screen and scrolled back up to the picture of the group sitting around the table. They looked happy. Excited, she decided. And Lena decided she was going to be excited, too. After all, what else was going to keep her mood elevated for the next 3 hours? ATP reports? She didn’t think so.

*****

And before you ask, I have no idea what ATP stands for. Something...important, I'm sure.

So now it's up to you, readers! Just one little click and you'll help me with my identity crises in no time! (No surgery required!)

Thanks in advance for your help. Again. I swear, if I ever get this novel published, I'll dedicate it to Abby Gabbers everywhere.

There's A Party Goin' On Round Here...

This video blog should, without a doubt, erase my husband's irritation at the now infamous "butt wiggle."


I.E: I dedicate this vlog to you, Brian. :0)





Can't see the video? Point your browser here: http://youtu.be/m-JXqjM_9dY

*     *     *     *     *     *     *     *     *     *     *     *     *     

= 6,087

And So It Begins...

Zero. My word count is at zero.


After today, that is a number I do not wish to see again.


That's right, folks! It is officially November 1! Which means, NaNoWriMo officially started 10 hours ago! Which means, I'm officially behind in starting my very first novel! (For those who missed this post, NaNoWriMo is an online challenge to write a 50,000 word novel in 30 days. No, I'm not crazy.) (Only because my straight jacket hasn't come yet.)

I'm having mixed emotions about this challenge at this particular moment. There's part of me that is calm, reserved, and ready to work. She looks like this:

I'm so clever, perhaps I'll write this novel with a PENCIL.

The over-thinking, over-planning, over-emotional part of me is freaking out because I didn't write much of an outline, I still haven't chosen a name for my main character, and I have no idea where I'm going to start my story. She looks something like this:

What the FRUIT have I gotten myself into??!?!?!?!??!

I'm banking on 3 very specific things to get me through the next 30 days. 1) Endless creativity. Or at least creativity in some form or fashion. 2) Guaranteed breaks for Castle. And 3) My good luck charm, which comes in the form of a hoody from Threadless.com.

Because we all know my affection for exclamation marks a plenty.

Don't worry, readers. I will still be posting my usual amount of blogs for your enjoyment for the next 30 days. Just don't be surprised if, by the end of the month, my blog posts read something like this sounds:






Patty!! Maybe I'll use Patty as my main character's name!!!


Anyway, I'm counting on you to keep me as accountable as possible throughout this challenge, so every day, I'll be posting my word count. Remember, I have to pound out 50,000 words total. So in order to accomplish that goal, I have to write about 1700 words a day. Which works out to be about 6 1/2 pages. That's not so hard, right?


* SOB *

= 0

Halloween Hilarity

Happy  Halloween...

From the Abby Gabs family!